Over the last six years of running my self development workshops for young children and their families, I have noticed something interesting….Many fathers see self development as something “airy fairy” or “wishy washy”. Most of the dad’s I’ve met are initially under the premise that “It’s up to mom!” The good news is that when dad’s see the positive development in their children, they generally come around and become active participants in their child’s journey of self growth. What I love is that when both parents are active participants and supporters of their child, the growth spurts are phenomenal.
It is fact, that women are more nurturing and emotional and thus having dad around to support with a more logical and goal orientated side of the brain is an added bonus. Dad’s, get out there and be involved in your child’s life! Not just kicking the ball around the garden on a Sunday afternoon, I mean REALLY involved. Have regular weekly family meetings where you act as chairman and your wife and children can table any items for discussion on the agenda. Running a family is like running a business and if “the boss” isn’t involved and doesn’t want to get his hands dirty, this inevitably leads to resentment, poor performance and lower productivity in the “work force”.
Many moms I speak to complain that their hubby’s are glorified “sperm donors” and only get to do the fun stuff with the kids, whilst they have to do the unpleasant things like homework, trips to the doctor and discipline. Research has shown that lack of a father figure in the home can lead to juvenile delinquency, poor self esteem and aggressive behavior. Just to mention that the aggressive behavior is not only limited to the children…moms themselves are prone to blaming and angry outbursts about nappy changes, or watching their children play sport or dads just not “being involved” in the family.
If you are a dad that is hand’s on and knows what is going on in your child’s life from A through to Z, I congratulate you. This is the biggest investment gift you can ever give your child. Ensure you keep the lines of communication open from a young age, so that your child feels they can approach you with any problem, no matter how big or how small. Remember it is quantity time that counts and not only quality time, so exciting trips to the movies or surfing or playing Adventure golf don’t actually rate highly on your child’s level of expectations. Years from now, what your child will remember are the memories you have created together and that your were the glue and foundation that held their very special family together. |
